Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
