i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
