how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
