Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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