I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Randomize
