After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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