every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
