Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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