She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize