And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
