At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
