we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
