My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize