Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
