i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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