so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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