So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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