I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
