I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
