Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
