The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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