try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
