Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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