I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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