ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize
