If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he quoted the bible to break up with me
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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