I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
