i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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