whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
