Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
