Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize