just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
she peed on how many people?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize