Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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