in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
