I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize