Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
