You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize