Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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