We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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