I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i think im in europe. pls send help
Randomize