the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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