They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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