The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize