I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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