im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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