kristin has been a bad kristin
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
