so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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