Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
