I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
