Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
