And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
