I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
